Proverbs says it best: Iron sharpens iron. 

Friends are a big part of who we are; they’re a huge part of who we’ve grown to be. They’re who we spend a bulk of our time venting to and growing with. They’ve been our voice of reason or support systems and sometimes just the bit of crazy we need when life – or an ex-boyfriend – gets out of hand. 

Friends are our momentary escapes from reality. The inside jokes are what we sometimes use to get away from the pain and stress of our everyday lives. The tears we shed on their shoulders make our vulnerability okay. Our friends show us that our true selves can be loved. They show us that our goofy, clumsy, moody, ambitious, sometimes annoying, happy, crazy selves are okay. They show us that we can be accepted and loved no matter how flawed we are. Friends are amazing contributions to our sanity and they help us in the areas of our lives that our parents just won’t understand – which sometimes seems like every area. 

Friends have a tremendous impact on us, and the company we keep can and will affect our lives, greatly. Not just socially or emotionally, but professionally, as well. 

Many of you are going places. I feel it. I know it. You have amazing goals you’re working toward and delightful destinations that you’re preparing to head toward. You have plans & outlines, and support from those around you. Your path is so brightly lit, that the only way to set on it is with your Ray Bans and a glass of Simply Lemonade (or lemonade flavored sparkling water). 

But what about your friends? Are they as vested in creating their future as you are? Are they as focused as you? Do they, like you, see the brightness of their future? Do they dream as hard as you, if not harder? Or are your friends lingering? Are they living life hanging by a thread? Are they blowing in the wind? Are they inspired/inspiring? Are they fighters/fighting? Are they workers/working? Or are they just clubbing, gossiping and carrying on? Can your friends sharpen you, in any way? 

If not, it may be time to tighten your circle. 

It is imperative that we align ourselves with women who can move, shake, inspire and shape us in ways that are relevant to what we’re trying to do and who we’re trying to become. Our friends take up large parts of our lives, and those parts much like everything else, should be carefully monitored. If you’re trying to be celibate, it wouldn’t behoove you to hang out with women who have one-night stands after the club and drag you to the hotel room with them. If you’re trying to cure your kleptomania, it wouldn’t be beneficial for you to head to the thrift store with your thieving friend. In the same respect, if you’re trying to achieve your goals and set forth on your path to establishing yourself in your passion, it wouldn’t be much help to surround yourself with people who take you from that; people who continue to pull you from your purpose. 

(And the same with us, we are to be a motivating force in our friends’ lives. A force that coincides with what and who they’re trying to become, not one that takes away from it.)

When you’re dreaming as big as you are, with a future as bright as it is, it’s only right to surround yourself with those of a similar mindset. Those who can support and sharpen you. Those who can help you grow, not hinder your growth. Those who are as dedicated as you, to push through and progress in life.  

Your friends do not have to have the same personal or professional goals as you. They do not have to be on the same path as you. They don’t even have to aspire to be in the same field as you. But they should, in some way, contribute to your growth. They should, in some way, be working hard for their goals, so your wine nights are filled with more ideas and strategy and less chatter about other people. They should see their future brightly lit too, so your nights out aren’t filled with cat-fights and twerking tussles. 

"Whoever walks with the wise becomes wise, but the companion of fools will suffer harm." Proverbs 13:20

Become wise.